Monday, August 29, 2005
I feel so chocolate-y today.
Haha, came to school with Sandhya's and Melissa's birthday presents. Two boxes of chocolates =)
HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY MELISSA. ( My beloved SHAN CAI MA)
wish you already.
So cannot complain.
5:53 PM
Friday, August 26, 2005
Courage
By Anne Sexton
It is in the small things we see it.
The child's first step,
as awesome as an earthquake.
The first time you rode a bike,
wallowing up the sidewalk.
The first spanking when your heart
went on a journey all alone.
When they called you crybaby
or poor or fatty or crazy
and made you into an alien,
you drank their acid
and concealed it.
Later,
if you faced the death of bombs and bullets
you did not do it with a banner,
you did it with only a hat to
comver your heart.
You did not fondle the weakness inside you
though it was there.
Your courage was a small coal
that you kept swallowing.
If your buddy saved you
and died himself in so doing,
then his courage was not courage,
it was love; love as simple as shaving soap.
Later,
if you have endured a great despair,
then you did it alone,
getting a transfusion from the fire,
picking the scabs off your heart,
then wringing it out like a sock.
Next, my kinsman, you powdered your sorrow,
you gave it a back rub
and then you covered it with a blanket
and after it had slept a while
it woke to the wings of the roses
and was transformed.
Later,
when you face old age and its natural conclusion
your courage will still be shown in the little ways,
each spring will be a sword you'll sharpen,
those you love will live in a fever of love,
and you'll bargain with the calendar
and at the last moment
when death opens the back door
you'll put on your carpet slippers
and stride out.
I so love this poem. I feel it really depicts alot about life.
11:14 PM
Thursday, August 25, 2005
Hey hey peeps. :)
It was bio practical prelims today. And a totally new experience i might add.
Background info: I only studied the mammalian eye, sexual reproduction in plants, transport in mammals and micro-organisms. Quite cool eh? How much i studied actually came out? ZERO ZIP ZILCH :)
Okie better not digress too much, back to the prelims. First, it was some identification of three powders. The instructions were complicated, but lucky thing is, i read the instructions twice so as not to mess up( as usual). And thank God, the identification came out okie, Except for a teeny weeny bit of problem, which was that my glucose+yeast solution did not have any reaction. So marks off. But my fault :)
Yeaps so now the CLIMAX. The fish. Yes, the fish. But i really expected worse. Mrs kumar said that it would be something dead, slimy and disgusting. Maybe a dead rat's rectum i guess. But no, it was a fish! Better still, i had to do something which was pretty much part of my chores. So it was okie. And i did not feel squeamish and all. Though it really stank. So yeah, we were supposed to draw the fish head( specifically eye, mouth and gills), and the first time i drew it, my fish was SMILING. Yes smiling. It looked totally hilarious and ridiculous that i burst out laughing. Which was really odd cos the people around me were like squirming in their seats and it's really weird cos it's really tense inside and when someone actually burst out laughing, it's EMBARRASSING. So the second time i drew it, it was frowning. Yes, the artistic blood really does not run in the family. And with all the spare time, i was actually playing with the fish. So my fish ended up having it's fin sticking up like someone pleading for rescue. Quite apt actually.
Got back the chemistry mock exam paper one results I really did not expect myself to get 36. I must thank God for it of course. Hahaha and also, maybe eating chocolate pocky during chemistry mock DO help. Cos i did that the last time do and did reasonably well. So i might write a petition to Cambridge requesting them for permission to eat chocolate pocky during my chem paper :)
Okie peeps i gotta fly, take truckloads of care and God bless. Tata~!
6:14 PM
Monday, August 22, 2005
Sometimes we've only one chance. Lose it and it'll be gone forever. Yet it's hard to sacrifice everything for it.
Decisions are hard to make. Don't you think so?
5:06 PM
Friday, August 19, 2005
It's been eons since I've stepped back into the band room for practice. And i've JUST realized how far back behind i was. Songs are getting terribly difficult. The only piece i was able to sight read properly or should i say decently was Alvamar Overture. Hah. I seriously need more practice on my timpani once the Os are over.
I do miss my timpani loads. It's been through alot with me. Of course who can ever forget the countless times it has failed to be in tune? Haha, it was probably my fault. Too lazy to tune it all the time. But the first hit on it was definitely SENSATIONAL. I'm so gonna do it again. YAY.
I missed my juniors too. Of cours when i went back i suffered tons of 'jackfruit' calling. ew. jackfruits are one on the stinkiest fruits. I know i don't smell like one cos there isn't something called a jackfruit perfume. Or i do not have the same biological components in the jackfruit that gives it its smell. But then again, talking and crapping (what else did u expect) with them really brought back the times we spend. yay. And of course laughing the Russell Peters jokes.
However, it's still the O levels. I guess i have to be more focused. Denise is studying harder den me. And i'm taking my exams this year. This shows what a slacker i am. So take care people. Tata~!
11:02 PM
Tuesday, August 16, 2005
English oral: NOT GOOD.
Yes. This is bad baD bAD BAD. Yes. First i POINTED AT THE PICTURE. Argh. Oh no. How was i supposed to know who is the taller one? And silly me still went ahead and POINT.
Conversation i was STUMPED. Competitions? OH NO. What to actually say?? Of course i talked abt experience, the joys and memories of it. The feeling of achievement when winning. Yeah. But that isn't special. And the lottery thing? Sighs. Not elaborating.
I need MORE valium.
8:41 PM
Monday, August 15, 2005
It's English oral tomorrow.
yay.
A maths was bad today.
Not THAT bad.
Just a little more disastrous then the usual
FINE THAT'S BAD.
I'm going crazy. And i don't care.
Let's serenade in the moonlight
Ohhh this feels so right.
Anyone want to come serenading with me in the moonlight tonight?
7:00 PM
Saturday, August 13, 2005
I'm confused.
I need valium. Anyone got some?
10:05 PM
Friday, August 12, 2005
Yeah. I got a B3. With distinction for my oral. Yes, I was terribly disappointed. i turned the tap on. But i want to thank some people.
Miaw hui, Huda, Pris, Candy, Amisha, Sandhya, Jiale, Liang Tong, Eliza, Ziad(i don't believe this either but he did make me laugh with his lame antics) , and Sok Hiang. Thanks alot all of you.
Well.. life is full of disappointments. It's how we face it and come out of it that matters. I was suicidal at first (according to Amisha). Well.. what else can she say? i was practically chanting 'pass the noose' during the whole of English lesson. And yeah, seeing plastic chairs as electric chairs.
But that's over. I'll just be dandy.
So take care people. Just face the future bravely and try ur best in other things. God Bless.
PS. I hate people stalking me. I think Candy knows what i mean. LOL.
8:31 PM
Thursday, August 11, 2005
It's out. The Mother Tongue O levels results would be released tomorrow.
My heart just could not stop going thumo thumping thump when i heard about it. But. I'll just let it go.
All these time i have been so worried on how i'll do. But it's all set. There's nothing i can do about it anyway.
So i'll just give it all to God and let Him guide me and whatever i get, i know it is for the best for me.
Amen.
5:26 PM
Monday, August 08, 2005
It's National Day today.
School celebrated it yesterday. And what fun it was!!! Ahhhhhh.. seeing the march past and band playing ignited a nostalgic feeling. Last year's celebration is SMASHING. And real cool.
When it came to the singing and dancing part, almost everyone did and liang tong was screaming 'OUR LAST NATIONAL DAY!!' So we really couldn't miss out on anything right?
Went to orchard with Miaw Hui and Siew Ling. Was pretty fun. Some incident happened at the ESPIRIT counter which I don't wanna repeat here. In case that gay person gets affected. Well.. went to raffles hospital next. And the best way to end my happy day, MATHS TUITION. Hahahah.. it was not that bad la.
And so.. VOILA. My happy happy day was over. And today, i have to start studying.
SOMEHOW.
11:06 AM
Sunday, August 07, 2005
Sometimes, i realize, animals may be so much better as compared to humans.
I was watching this documentary on discovery channel on octupuses giving birth and it's really sad. The mother octupus would protect her eggs from all the predators which want to eat it and to do that she has to stay by her eggs 24/7 for many days, without food. Sometimes, if she is really hungry, she would not leave her eggs, she would actually eat HERSELF. Once the eggs hatches, she would then be able to leave. However, by that time, she would be so weak from hunger that other enemies would attack her and she dies.
Such sacrificial love.
Whereas some human mothers kill their infant child or torture them. Yet animals can die in order to protect their young. Humans are definitely smarter, but are they better? Abortion rates are on the rise and this is reflecting on our society. Well.. this is a bad bad world. We just have to live with it. And actually, we can actually learn from the animals.
So i better stop now. take care everyone. Ciaos~
4:24 PM
Friday, August 05, 2005
Is the world becoming a better place? Maybe not.
I don't understand what's with gay marriages. Not at all. Men marring MEN?? Preposterous. Yeah, true love is what others say. But is loving someone the same gender really normal? Well.. i have never experienced it personally but all i can say is, when i look at a girl, i would see her as a future marriage prospect. A best friend or sister at most.
God has never created a guy to be with a guy. Or a guy to turn into a gal. Either way, it's just as wrong. And allowing marriages?? Oh no. Imagine the couple wanting to have kids and adopt one next time. So great. He has TWO daddies and no mummies. And as time pass by, these children would grow up thinking that having gay parents are normal. And the vicious cycle continues.
Oh well.. after all, gay marriages are already legalised. What can i do anyway? Just grumble here i guess.
Haha, so take care everyone! Adieu.
PS. The saddest thing that happens is that most gay people are actually cute. Argh.
8:10 PM
Tuesday, August 02, 2005
"No one understands how i feel" or "You don't understand me".
Yes, that statement is definitely overused in our society, especially by teenagers. Cliche it may sound, but most people think that it is true. Of course, i do not.
Well.. i believe that what we feel, most of the time, we actually are pitying ourselves. We wallow in self pity and moan and groan over our misery. And when we tell others abt it and we do not hear what we want to hear, we'll say" you don't understand me".
Do we really understand ourselves in the first place? I don't know. Well.. people always use that statement when they do not hear what they want to hear. Tell a depressed person that the world is a happy place and there are things worth living for, they person would say "you don't understand me". However. it's real. Has it become so unreal that to understand a person we must actually agree with things we actually don't agree with? Well.. i still don't know.
Ahahhaa.. was thinking abt it when i was alone in my room yesterday. I admit that i'm guilty of the "u don't understand me thing" however, i'll try to change. i'll try.
And nites. LOL.
7:08 PM